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The Divorce rate in the United States has been relatively steady for the past 20 years. What has boomed in the last 20 years or so are the people who decide to have children out of wedlock. Almost 50% of children born in the United States are now born outside of marriage. It is no longer a race specific issue or problem, people of all walks all life are choosing to have a child first and then possibly marry. This is completely different than our parents generation where you were shunned to have a child without being married (at least in my Catholic/Italian World). Now whether you are married or live together, there is a post holiday spike in break ups and divorce filings.
There is no easy explanation for this but some thoughts come to mind. For one, one can only fake it so long. When the bond is broken and neither party seeks to fix it, its over. Second, you or your significant other can no longer think of the idea of being surrounded by your in-laws during the holidays ever again. Third, the holidays are stressful enough and when people get around in-laws, things can be said that cause major fights. How do you jump into a fight between your mother and wife? No easy answer there. Fourth, New Year's Resolutions. People seek to enter the year with the hope that the new year will improve. One way to do that is to move forward and end a toxic relationship. Another issue concerning the holidays is that many people are often let down and can no longer take it. I am not saying one reason is better than the other or that any of these reasons justify a breakup/divorce but it is reality. While a divorce/breakup may seem to be the best option for you, you should try to work out what you can with your significant other. If that does not work, you should try to work out a plan as to what the next steps will be, how the children (if any) will be affected (child custody and parenting time), how that conversation with the kids should be handled, who will keep certain assets, etc. In closing, the grass is not always greener on the other side and you should do what you can to stay together, at least for Valentine's Day.
Santo Vincenzo Artusa, Jr. I am the owner and founder of the Artusa Law Firm, P.C. He has extensive experience in all matters related to family law and divorce in New Jersey.